Lisa's reflective account of Day 32....

I went over to see Theo early that day for nurse handover. One of us had been there for nearly every nurse handover since Theo was born. I thought it was really important to see who was looking after him and tell them anything about him that they weren’t sure of. We sometimes found that the nurses didn’t handover how involved we were in Theo’s care and everything we did for him, so we had to explain the same thing over again to nurses that hadn’t looked after him before. Phil and Jack came over for the ward round. The Drs were happy with Theo’s progress. His tiny little body was doing amazingly well fighting off a horrible sepsis infection. They stopped another of his antibiotics, he’d gone from having three different ones to just one now which was good. After the ward round Phil stayed with Theo while Jack and I went to Manchester Arndale Centre. I’d had a word with myself and I would be ok going out this time because Phil was with Theo and Jack realllllllly needed holiday things! My car was still at home so we had to go in Phil’s car. I hadn’t driven for over a month and I’d only driven Phil’s car a handful of times. He’d parked right next to the entrance so it was easy to spot when we got to the car park. As we were getting in the car, someone just coming in saw that we were leaving, he indicated to come into our spot and waited. I had to adjust the seat and all of the mirrors before we set off so it took a few minutes. He started beeping and giving me abuse. I don’t know where he was going or why but it highlights exactly why you should not be mean to people. He had no idea what was happening in our world. I wanted to scream to him that our baby was lying in intensive care, but I didn’t obviously. I had done nothing to deserve the grief other than make sure the car was safe to drive and Jack was with me too! We knew what we needed to get and the shops we needed to go to so we shopped very well! Jack was absolutely amazing, he hates shopping usually. He was really conscious about how I was feeling and kept me talking to keep my mind away from the hospital. He was so grown up, he did a fantastic job that day. I phoned Phil only a couple of times to check on Theo. I treated Jack to his favourite, Wagamamas for being so good. He got takeaway so that we could go back to the hospital. I was so proud of him, he was super caring and considerate. Theo had been good while we were away but I was glad to see him. My sister and her children came later that afternoon to see Jack before his hols. Phil took the children to Ronald McDonald and made tea whilst Leanne and I spent some time with Theo. It was nice to see them. Jack goes away tomorrow! I’m happy and sad about it. He should definitely go and let his hair down, it’s a great opportunity for him but I’ll miss him so much!!!

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