Lisa's reflective account of Day 30....

It’s was our beautiful baby’s one month Birthday that day. How could he be one month old and still 11 weeks early?? It was ridiculous. It had been an emotional whirlwind but one month had passed so quickly. I still couldn’t imagine him being big and strong enough to leave hospital, that seemed so far in the future. Jack saw the counsellor, she said that he was such a lovely boy, really mature and kind. He was dealing with everything very well. He missed home and our dogs but wanted us all to be together at Ronald McDonald. Pretty much what we had all discussed together previously but I was glad he’d seen her. He said he felt better for it and would like to see her again. I felt better knowing that he was ok. He was really looking forward to going on holiday. One of his other friends had asked Jack over to his house for the night so Phil took him there whilst I stayed with Theo. I was really glad Jack had such kind friends and their parents that allowed him to have fun and keep him occupied away from the hospital. One of our friends came to visit Theo and I. It was really nice to have company but it was hard explaining all that had happened and everything with Theo when people came for the first time. It was impossible for anyone to really understand the magnitude of what we’d been through unless they had been through it also. Theo had a good day that day, he was doing well with his feeds. We were increasing the volume of milk by 0.5ml every 12 hours and he was back on hourly feeds. He was still on Morphine and antibiotics but having less drops in heart rate and oxygen saturations. I had been thinking about my panic attack the day before and how I would be able to go shopping for Jack’s holiday things. I had decided that if Phil stayed with Theo whilst Jack and I went shopping then I would feel better than if we all went. Theo would have someone with him and Phil could answer his phone if I wanted to ring. We planned to go to the Arndale Centre on Friday. Hopefully we would be in and out and get everything we needed in super quick time. Theo had a really good nurse looking after him, her and Phil both talked me into going out for tea. It would be our 15th wedding anniversary tomorrow and we could have a nice meal out just the two of us. I went but was clock watching and couldn’t wait to get back to Theo. We had a nice meal though spending the whole time talking about our 2 boys! Ha!

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